Safer Sex

A drawing of two people on a bed in missionary position

The following text uses the word “pussy*” as defined by Pussypedia.

by Anonymous Pussy Hero

Have you ever watched a movie or television scene where the character attempted to put on a condom? Or at least have the decency to ask “Do you have protection?” It’s just so uncommon! Typically, characters jump right into intense foreplay, a hint of intercourse and a panting climax. This may be the norm on screen, but it shouldn’t be the norm in real life.

Sexuality is a part of our life and our choices. We should be able to enjoy it safely and comfortably. Here we will review some options to protect yourself against sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and prevent pregnancy, so you can enjoy sex while keeping your health a priority. Barrier methods are the only contraceptive methods that protect against STIs. We will focus on those.

Male Condoms

Condoms protect against most STIs, but not all. They’re 85% to 98% effective depending on how carefully we use them.1

There are three types of male condoms: latex (by far the most common ones), synthetic, and natural membrane which are sometimes called “lambskin condoms.” Natural membrane condoms have little holes and might not protect you against STIs. For people allergic to latex, synthetic condoms are a better option. Still, the effectiveness of synthetic condoms at preventing STIs has not been sufficiently studied.2  So if you don’t have any condition, go with latex.

Spermicide-coated condoms exist too, but researchers do not recommend them because they’re not more effective than other types of condoms, are more expensive and have a shorter shelf-life. It has also been shown to increase the risk of urinary tract infections (UTIs).2

To get a condom on a penis, first pinch gently the little part that pokes out (the tip) and unroll it over the erect body; this extreme is where the semen gets collected. Leave it sticking out when you put the condom on! If the whole condom is stretched out, it’s more likely to break.1 If a partner is uncircumcised, pull back the foreskin first and then unroll. (See the instructional video in resources below. If you want to see more how-to videos, search “How to put on a condom” on YouTube. There’s a million dudes putting on condoms for “educational” purposes 😂.)

Use a new condom each time. If you’re not sure what counts as a “time,” just go on ahead and use a new condom.

A 2009 Consumer Reports Survey found that condom performance does not vary by thickness, country of manufacture, or price,2 so it’s ok to buy the cheap ones. They come in so many varieties nowadays that you can feel natural sensations and even extra ones when they’re textured.

Myth Busting: There IS semen in pre-cum (the liquid that comes out of penises for lubrication before ejaculation) and you CAN get pregnant from it.3 Chances of pregnancy are small but still real. So! Condom prior to touching parts with people!

Female Condoms

Female condoms are great because you don’t have to convince anyone else to put them on. If you have a pussy*, you can put it on yourself, even up to 8 hours ahead of time.4 They aren’t as easy to find or as cheap as male condoms but they are still a resourceful safer sex method, designed to protect both against pregnancy and STIs.

The female condom has two rings; the first one to insert over the cervix and the 2nd one is to hang it out of the vagina. This condom needs to be squeezed and it opens once is positioned correctly. No need to pinch a tip here. (Please see the note above about latex lubrication. Most new female condoms are made of polyurethane and nitrile, and they work with water or oil lubes, but you still might want a latex one).4

Never use female and male condoms at the same time. Condom on condom rubbing could cause ripping. Use a new one every time (same as for male condoms: when in doubt, use another one.) If you have limited access to condoms or other ways of protecting yourself, washing, disinfecting, and reusing female condoms might be better than using nothing at all, but researchers still aren’t sure.6

Be careful that the penis doesn’t go outside the ring; it has to go into the loop. Make sure the condom doesn’t get pushed inside during sex. Because female condoms are a little harder to use, they have lower effectiveness than male condoms. Studies estimate the rates of pregnancy during the first 12 months of perfect use are 5% and for typical use (how it’s actually used in real life) they’re 21%. (For male condoms they’re 2% and 13%, respectively.)5

If a person with a penis tells you they don’t want to use one, ask yourself if your health is worth the risk. Respect your body.

Dental Dams

Almost nobody uses these, but the world would be better if more people did! Or at least have less STIs in it. These are for giving or receiving oral sex (getting licked) in the pussy* or anus. They are a latex sheet that is layered once over the vulva or anus. The latex protects your pussy*, mouth, or anus from transmission of fluids. Unfortunately, they’re not very easy to find in stores.6 But see the video below in the resources section that shows how to turn a condom into one!

For anything latex:

Store it in a cool, dry place, out of direct sun, as heat weakens latex. Still, you can carry them around with you in a purse or wallet for up to one month. Check the expiration date and don’t use anything past its date or more than 5 years after the manufacturing date.2

Using enough lubricant helps prevent broken condoms. Oil-based and water-based lubes are safe with polyurethane and polyisoprene condoms, but water based lubricants are only safe with latex.1 Here are some things to keep far, far away from latex condoms (these things break condoms!): cold cream, olive /peanut /corn /sunflower /canola /coconut /baby oil, butter, cocoa butter, margarine, whipped cream, hand/body lotion, massage oil, sunscreen, petroleum jelly (vaseline), alcohol and any vaginal medications you’re using that contain any of the above (some contain mineral oil, check its ingredients).2

Other types of contraception:

There are other non-barrier types of contraception to protect against pregnancy such as diaphragms, spermicides, oral birth control pills, and LARCs but those don’t protect against STIs.

In conclusion, protect your pussy*, luv. It’s a gateway to your health and life. ❤️

Author’s Dedication: “It’s the POWER of the P.U.S.S.Y.!” – Jay-Z


  1. OBOS Birth control contributors: Kelly Blanchard, Heather Corinna, Marjorie Greenfield, Mary Ann Leeper, Lisa Perriera, Kirsten Thompson, et. al. “Male Condoms.” Our Bodies Ourselves. (2011).
  2. Warner Lee, Markus Steiner, Katherine Stone. “Male Condoms.” UptoDate. (2018).
  3. So, Can You Get Pregnant with Precum?” American Pregnancy Association. Accessed 2019.
  4. OBOS Birth control contributors: Kelly Blanchard, Heather Corinna, Marjorie Greenfield, Mary Ann Leeper, Lisa Perriera, Kirsten Thompson, et. al.  “Female Condoms.” Our Bodies Ourselves. (2012).
  5. Hoke, Theresa, Stone Katherine, Markus Steiner, Lee Warner. “Female Condoms.” UptoDate. (2018).
  6. Kimberly Holland. “Everything You Need to Know About Using a Dental Dam.” Healthline. (2018).

This article was previously published in Pussypedia and is reposted with permission.